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Baker's Delight

This is a truly frightening tale. It really makes you wonder how the Clueless think (it’s a proven fact that they do, it’s just that their logic circuits seem to have been rewired by a two year old on acid). The GM who submitted this is deserving of our deepest sympathies.
A pair of runners had been hired to ‘extract’ a researcher from a corporate office park (small corp, small building). One of them happens to be a chill sneaky-silent type, with lots of grease and connections. His pad is wired for sound proofing, reinforced walls, the works, paranoid city. The other member of the team is a raging death machine. He lives in a cardboard box because no one seems to notice when the homeless "disappear."

The run starts up as follows: after doing a bit of legwork they come up with the plans for the building, sec shifts, the works. Their decker contact has ‘arranged’ for the security desk cameras to be hit with a looped image when the deed goes down, and the chill chummer has all his grapple/climbing gear so that he can go roofside and then drop in on the victims office through a window (had a glass cutter as well). The chill PC informs the death machine that he needs someone to watch his back to make sure no one is hanging around the building that isn’t a passer by.

The plan is underway. PC1 is on the roof about to climb down to the targeted window, when the death machine sees something ‘funny’ (actually it was just a switch of shifts at the lobby info desk).

PC2: "I go back to the car"
PC1: "What?!"
GM: (to PC1) "OK, what are you doing?"
PC1: "I set my stealth line."
PC2: "I open the trunk and grab the assault cannon."
GM: "OK, you have it."
PC2: "I start shelling the building."
PC1: "What the &*!! are you doing?"
PC2: "Be quiet! Like I said, I start shooting the building."
GM: "OK, the building looks really torn up, the lobby resembles a charnel house, and the building is becoming structurally unsound (belt fed AC ammo has a tendency to do this).
PC2: "hahahahaha"
PC1: "I am outta here, leave the way I came up and stay out of sight."
GM: "OK. Sirens are coming this way."
PC1: "I am hiding big time."
PC2: "I drop the cannon. Is there anything else around?"
GM: "There is a bakery across the street."
PC2: "I go there."
PC1: "This isn’t happening…"
GM: "You walk into the bakery, the baker looks terrified." (saw the whole thing)
PC2: "Sir, I would like a muffin."
GM: "ummm wha-wha-what tttype?’
PC2: "Poppyseed."
GM: "OK" A Lone Star patrol officer enters the bakery and approaches you. "I’d like to ask you a few questions."
PC2: "I’m just eating a muffin."
GM: "Did either of you witness the shooting that just went down?"
PC2: "I lop his head off!"
GM & PC1: "You what?!?"
PC2: "I draw my combat ax and lop his head off."
GM: "OK… the decapitated Lone Star cop goes down and you look up to see a number of other Lone Star officers standing outside, watching this whole deal."
PC2: "Damn."

Needless to say, PC2 was arrested and thrown in the back of a patrol vehicle. What makes this even worse is that PC1 tries to go save his chummer (or ex-chummer after this pooch screw) and sets up his sniper rifle to take out the driver of the patrol vehicle. Unfortunately, he Rule of One’s his shot, blowing a back tire off the car, which skids out of control into oncoming traffic, so instead of being taken to a maximum security holding cell, PC2 ends up in a maximum security hospital room.

Sparing the details, the escape that follows still blinds me to this day, involving a hostage situation, followed by a leap through a window of the 5th floor of the hospital, the hijacking of an ambulance, and more carnage than I would like to admit.

Karen - karenmr@shadowrun.html.com

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